Perceptions

I'm really sad right now because I have a friend who hates another person that I'm friends with. That normally is not a problem, but she continues to insult me and tell me I'm blinded by this person and can't see the real them. Honestly, I don't care who is friends with whom - I can be friends with different people, no matter if they get along or not.

The person she hates happens to be someone I consider a close friend. This isn't someone I've only been talking to for a year or something. I have known her for over 3 years and for the past nearly 2 years, she's been an invaluable friend to me. She has helped me through the darkest time in my life and is ALWAYS there for me, no matter what time of the day or night. No matter if I just need to cry about something stupid or if I have something really major going on. She is a true friend. I am not blinded by her - she doesn't have some great jedi mind trick that she's played on me. She's a good friend. She knows secrets about me that she's never divulged. I trust her and I think she's great.

I don't want to lose either of them as a friend. I don't care if they don't get alone, heck if they hate each other, fine with me. Just leave me out of.

Oy vey

I'm sore as hell. Did track work today and ran for most of it - I'm very sore. I have to work a shift tonight too, I'm insane.

I'm off Sunday and Monday from both jobs - I was actually off today, but I picked up a shift because I wanted some spending money for the weekend. We're going to a cookout tomorrow, which should be fun. No plans for Monday except to maybe take the kids to a movie.

I still feel like I'm away from the house an awful lot. I'm down to 2 days at The Pot, which is great, but now I'm gone with my running. But you know what? I can't be home all the time. I'm trying to better myself mentally and physically and earn us some money too. I know it's hard on Dave sometimes, I do know it. The boys can be really taxing at times.

However, I've spent the last 10 years essentially taking care of everyone and always being around. I won't say I did everything because I certainly didn't and Dave does even more now that he used to around the house. As Karen told me, I have to remember that I deserve time for myself.

I'm feeling good about the workouts - I look forward to them now. I had a friend tell me that she's going to send me something when I hit my goal of a size 10. More motivation.

I've been watching 21 Jumpstreet - Johnny Depp sure was hot, even back then. Yum.

I KNEW I would see progress...

Last night, after my tables were gone at work, I took my belt off after using the bathroom. I didn't feel like having it on for some reason. Well, turns out my work pants are FALLING off of me. I can pull them on and off of me without unbuttoning them - I'm so friggin' excited!!!! They were definitely tight when I started working there.

I need new pants now, yay!! I'm going to not stress about the money of having to get new pants for work, I figure that is a reward for all my hard work. It's only gonna be $15 or $20 bucks anyway. I deserve to have pants that fit!!

I feel like I should be updating my blog more frequently, but then I feel like nothing is going on that's different or worth talking about. My life is pretty much the same day after day, just doing different things on different days.

I'm starting to see progress from my working out. My bras are not tight like they used to be and I feel like my jeans are a little looser, but I'm not sure yet. I have plenty of pants that I couldn't fit into before that I'm excited to wear again, but I'm not there yet. The scale is a little discouraging but I'm trying to remember what my trainer said, which is that I'm building a lot of muscle right now and will be losing inches first, not weight. I'd still like to see a 1 in front of my weight though and I'm not there yet. Not really that close right now either. I will get there though, I'm determined.

Not looking forward to the server's meeting this morning at the restaurant. I think it's going to go on for hours and I have to work a shift at 3pm. My schedule for next week SUCKS. I'm trying to look at the bright side. I'm working Monday & Tuesday (no money days most likely), then I'm hosting on Friday. HOSTING again? Ugh, that's no money. I'm off Saturday, my biggest money day. I guess that's good because it's nice to have a Saturday off once in a while, but I'm stressing about money right now. I might try to pick up a shift though. I'd really prefer to just serve on Friday instead of hosting and keep the Saturday off. I wonder who the manager is on Friday and if I can convince them to let me serve instead of host. Hmmm.

The boys are throwing stuffed animals at each other and screaming. They crack me up. Cassie's still sleeping - she stayed up late watching Friends. Dave & I watched the CSI finale (again for me, he missed it on Thursday). I fell asleep before the end, of course, but I'd already seen it. Quentin Tarantino is a genius, an absolute genius!

My house is a mess. I want a clean house, but I don't want to clean it. I'm always doing something - working, working out, working again. I hate cleaning. Damn it!

Busy busy busy

Seems like there's always something to do. I'm sure the PTA is pissed off because I haven't added up the numbers from the Spring Fair, which was a week and a half ago. Honestly, the last thing I want to do when I have a day off is more work. I will have to get on it this weekend and get it done. Thank God they found someone else to be Treasurer next year!

There's been tons of drama going on lately, both personal and online. I'd like a break from it so hopefully the online gods are hearing me and will make it stop. Personal drama is over with, so the online portion needs to catch up.

I'm working tonight, dinner with a friend tomorrow, then working (host shift, BLECH) on Friday and a serving shift on Saturday. I don't have next week's schedule yet, so I don't know if I'm working Sunday or not - probably not. HOPEFULLY not. Apparently, there's a large training class that started on Monday. It would be nice if even 2 servers worked out from that class. Then I can go back to having my 2 days a week. I need to remember to request off for Father's Day.

I just realized that MIL is coming for a visit in 3 weeks. That sure did sneak up on me!!! Gotta start cleaning the house.

Mother's Day 2005

I hope all you moms out there are having a great day!!!!!

I've had a rough week. It's getting better though. Things have been hard with Alex lately. I also wasn't paying attention to paydays and thought Dave got paid Friday when, in fact, he doesn't get paid until Tuesday. Well, Alex's birthday is Monday and he really wants to go to Medieval Times. I told him we could, then it turns out we don't have the money. I got really upset about that because his birthday present isn't here yet either. I ordered it last week from ebay and I guess the guy hasn't shipped it yet. Grrrrrrr.

I was able to pick up a serving shift last night and made enough for us to go, so I'm very excited. We're leaving in just a bit - we all had such a great time last year, I can't wait!

Mother's day's been nice so far. I got some chocolate and Napoleon Dynamite on DVD, which I've really wanted. We're all watching it now. Retarded movie, I love it.

Working out is going fine - I'm so sore, though, ugh!!!! Oh well, I know it will get better.

P.S. Happy Birthday to one of my best friends, Leah. I know she won't see this for a few days, but I wanted her to know I'm thinking of her and I hope she's having a great time in Miami :)

Somebody help me...

I can't move. My muscles are SO sore after day two.

I'm thinking about sleeping on the couch so I don't have to walk up the stairs haha.

I Survived

Several things in the last few days ;)

First off, I was able to serve on Saturday night and it felt good. My arm did start to hurt toward the end of shift, but other than that, it was great. I did almost cry when my shift started, but it had nothing to do with my arm.

The order in which the servers arrive determines the order we get tables. I was first in, so the first table sat should have gone to me. However, it was a party of 10 and the hosts/managers were trying to take it easy on me so they skipped me and gave it to the next person. Well, the next party was a party of 8 and they asked if I wanted it. Sure, I figured I could always ask for a little help since it was early, so I took it.

Guess what those 8 people did? Brought 6 kids with them!!! So, I went from being passed over for a 10 top to getting FOURTEEN top!!! I laughed hysterically for a few minutes, then pulled myself together and handled it. I'm a rock star, I tell ya. After that, it was smooth sailing.

Today, I survived my first Fitness Challenge workout. I'm not all that sore yet either, but Alex (my trainer) assured me that I would get there. I'm excited to see results - I know it's going to take time, but I'm determined.